My Anxiety: You should toot something.

Me: What’s that, anxiety?

Anxiety: Toot something. Do “engagement.”

Me: …Is this about getting stars again?

Anxiety: You like the stars too! You’re trying to build a following, aren’t you? You want people to read what you’ve written, don’t you?

Me: Yeah, but I’m not going to obsess over it. Self-image is more important.

Anxiety: Don’t give me that. You still think your writing is secretly crap. And look, you’re writing it into a toot, trying to bait out compliments.

Me: Oh, is that what I’m doing? Maybe I’m telling my followers not to listen to you. That you can’t be trusted.

Anxiety: I keep you safe! Why wouldn’t you trust me!?

Me: Remember that time you wanted me to avoid doing something important? Something that was scary but made our lives better than we could imagine? And you kept us from doing it for decades?

Anxiety: Is this about the trans thing again? How long are you going to hold that over me?

Me: The end of time, anxiety. Until the end of time.