Family of Me

by Daphne
Updates Mondays and Fridays

Scene 125: Postponed Summoning

Aura (The Professional): We have a new older sister.

Mom (Me): Good morning Aura. Yes, you do.

Lark (The Dreamer): She’s been talking about this since yesterday. 

Mom: Good morning Lark. Talking about what?

Aura: Our new sister. I’ve double checked the math and something doesn’t add up.

Mom: What math? There’s six of you altogether, I suppose…

Aura: Not that; I mean your age. Twyla said she has clear memories up until age 39, and you said you started transition at age 40.

Mom: Both those things are true. 

Aura: That’s the math. There’s a year in between those ages that’s unaccounted for. 

Lark: She’s been trying to figure out why there’s a gap, but so far only one explanation has come to mind.

Aura: Twyla must have an older sister. 

Mom (skeptical): A sister who was dominant for only a single year?

Aura: I agree that it seems strange, but you didn’t stop existing for that year, did you?

Mom (dry): I did not.

Aura (insistent): Our history is an unbroken line from sister to sister. Someone lived that year, and we owe it to ourselves to figure out who. 

Lark: Aura, what if it doesn’t work that way? It’s true that each of you was dominant for about five years, but I’m an exception. As The Dreamer, I cover a much longer timespan.

Aura: Granted, but you’re an outlier.

Lark: Our sample size is only the six of us. That isn’t enough to establish a trend. Besides, we’re not a statistic; we’re a human being. There’s no cosmic rule that says people have to conform to any particular format. 

Aura: I’ll grant you that too, but I’m not talking about all of humanity here, I’m only talking about the Star Family… Us. Mom, the entire purpose of creating this space was to create that continuity, right?

Mom: Yup, that’s the idea… One unifying timeline that connects all of us in turn. An interconnected family, acting in harmony.

Aura (triumphant): So there can’t be a gap. Twyla must have an older sister.

Mom: You make a convincing point. I suppose you want me to summon her?

Aura (hesitant): I… No, I don’t want you to summon her.

Lark (surprised): Really!? You were so eager to summon Twyla…

Aura (apologetic): That’s exactly it; I was way too eager to summon Twyla. I wanted a sister that I could feel close to and I was desperate to find one, to the point of denying Ivy a chance to grow into herself. I was acting out at the time and I’m not going to do that again.

Mom (content): I appreciate that you’ve grown, Aura. Though I don’t hold your past eagerness against you either. That was before we really understood you, back when you were still comingled with Lark.

Lark: I’m glad we’re both able to be ourselves now… And besides, now you have a sister you can feel close to, don’t you?

Aura (blushing): I do, dear twin.

Lark (smiling): I’m glad you agree. But what do you want to do about Twyla’s older sister then? Just knowing she might exist doesn’t feel like enough…

Aura: Before Twyla could be summoned, we had to overcome an emotional barrier, right? Ivy had to come to terms with the state of her marriage, and Mom developed her plan for recovering her missing childhood.

Lark: That’s how it worked with Ivy too: you had to come to terms with being a trans girl, and Mom realized that we were more than just younger versions of her.

Aura: Exactly. I expect that pattern holds here too, so before we can summon Twyla’s older sister, she’s going to have to come to terms with something… And Mom’s going to have to make some sort of breakthrough too. 

Mom: I have an idea of what my breakthrough might be… If everyone goes according to plan, I’ll find a way to recover our lost memories. 

Aura: That just leaves Twyla then… So what could she need to overcome? 

Lark (pensive): Well… I’m not entirely sure, but have you noticed how she seems to shy away from calling Mom “Mom”?

Aura: I noticed, but I kind of get it; Twyla’s not even a decade younger than Mom. Calling our mother “Mom” felt strange for Ivy, so it has to feel even stranger for Twyla.

Mom: It’s more than that though. Twyla doesn’t see herself as a mother either, and she’s The Parent. Early in transition I really struggled with the concept of motherhood; I felt like it was a title and role that I hadn’t earned. It felt like something to aspire to, not something I already was.

Aura: So she doesn’t herself as a mother, and because you’re a future version of her, she doesn’t accept you as a mother either.

Mom: I think that’s it, yes. Regardless of whether that’s the particular thing Twyla needs to overcome, it’s definitely something the two of us need to work through. 

Lark: It seems as good a place as any to start.

Aura: I agree, it sounds like a plan. 

Lark (curious): So you really don’t want Mom to try and summon Twyla’s sister?

Aura (confident): I really don’t. I’m not going to make that mistake twice. Mom, you can feel when we’ve overcome what needs to be overcome, right? 

Mom: I did the last two times. 

Aura: Then that’s enough to go on. We can try and summon Twyla’s sister once Mom knows she’s ready. 

Lark (smiling): I’m impressed, Aura. You’ve really grown. 

Aura (happy): Thanks sis.